My Way or the Higher Way

In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps. --Proverbs 16:9

Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails. --Proverbs 19:21

Someone once told me that they admire the fact that when I see something I want, I go after it. This is a blessing and a curse. See, because I have a tendency to think my plans are brilliant, I have to check myself when I pray to make sure that I am seeking God's plans rather than asking God to bless my plans. It's been a hard lesson for my self-seeking mind to learn, but my life is not about me, it's about God. And thank goodness for that! If my life was all about me and my plans, I would have much smaller, less exciting existence. My vision is limited and seeking only to please myself with my limited understanding would land me in situation after situation that I don't want to be in. Of course, because of my severe lack of foresight, I wouldn't know I was walking into disaster until I found disaster and began to retrospectively reflect upon my choices. We are very blessed we have a God who has allowed us free will to pursue our own plans and fail until we finally learn that our own plans aren't worth any fraction of the time and energy that we put into making them. I praise God for all the times that I have had to face the consequences for my actions so that I could learn how poor my own planning is and how desperately I need to consult God for His plan.

Ultimately, God has a purpose and plan for each of us that is far greater than what we ourselves could imagine. When I pray, I pray for His plans to come into fruition so that He will be glorified. I wear my emotions very close to the surface, so I tend to get excited (or very depressed) about things before consulting God for His will. It is still sometimes challenging for me to remember when I get hit an emotional extreme over something that God knows more than me and that I may be excited over something that isn't really in my best interest or depressed about the very thing that is best for me. The premature excitement about someone was a common theme in my dating life before I met my husband! This same type of them is also woven into to most major decisions I have faced including professional decisions and the recent move my husband and I made. I want God to direct my steps and define my purpose, and I have to squelch my emotions so that I don't wander off course and miss the higher calling on my life by settling for something lessor when the lessor is all I can see.