Graciousness

I admit that American Idol has been a guilty pleasure for me this year. I don't vote, but I do get excited to see the results shows. I know it's silly, but I deal with real issues all day at work, and I like to have a brief escape to look forward to a couple times a week. Last night, I was quite disappointed to see Melinda Doolittle get booted from the show. In addition to having the best singing voice this season, Melinda is also an outspoken Christian woman, and for this reason even more than her vocal talent, I was pulling for her to succeed. Last night when she got voted off, two things occured to me. First, she is probably better off not winning because now she can make whatever type of album she chooses to make instead of being forced into some cookie cutter pop album mode. I'd love to see her make a gospel album because I think it would be brilliant. Second, the grace with which she handled what had to be disappointing news to her blew me away. She smiled, didn't shed a single tear, and graciously applauded the two whom the public selected. Her absolute peace with her circumstances set a beautiful example of how Christians should live before the world. After months and months of hard work, her efforts came to an end and this had to be a let down for her. Yet she stood in front of the camera and her actions said not my will, but God's will be done. Knowing how self-absorbed I can be, I was actually moved to tears by Melinda's faith. Like her, I know that God's plan is better than my own, but when I've poured so much of myself into something with the hopes of a specific outcome, I often have a hard time smiling graciously. As I watched her and felt my own emotion welling up, God convicted me again that grace like Melinda displayed is God's call on the lives of all mature Christians. He wants to bring me to a place of such rest in Him where I can face the entire roller coaster of life with a heart of total surrender and peace--maybe not always with a smile, but always with the grace that is a natural offshoot of yielding to higher plan than my own, of dying to myself and living in Him.